inktober etc.

I decided to try to commit (cautiously) to Inktober this year because I had so much success doing my 100 Days project last year. 21 days in and I haven’t missed a one and I’ve produced some pretty painterly pieces around a theme. In fact I’m writing this at my (new) job but I have some more to add to the inktober dump when I get home.

The prompt for this day was “stuck” so I was going to do a sexy conflict with a dagger involved but I wasn’t in the mood so I did this purple skinned orc type instead.
Kawaii boobie fun colors
I almost couldn’t generate an idea for “pick” so I threw it in as some dialogue haha
One of the earliest prompts that I really got into
My kid being a tall skinny gremlin
Ronan was getting weird with his toys
a quick family portrait
I spent so many days working linelessly I was beginning to doubt if I could be satisfied with lines, so I did just lines
Ronan kept asking for Mommy, Gaggee and Ronan pictures when he’d look at my old pre-baby family portraits. But we’re poor so I haven’t gotten this one printed yet.
this prompt combined two days so i could spend more time on this archangel gal
so ronan was super sick this week for the first time ever and it gave him super toddler powers that almost broke us. but yet he’s obsessed with the stars and moon like a true witch’s child.
sexy danny after he popped up in my dream, using the same lyrics i used a decade ago
last night i had a dream i was crushing on the crow lady from kikis delivery service since ronan and i watched it this week, but she told me she thought i had a thing going with andrew but i was afraid he was going to friendzone me. ronan was very confused and couldnt figure out if i was drawing mommy or daddy. story of my life ronan. story of my life,

update?!?!?!?! update. update!

It’s been a quiet summer art-wise what with graduating from Saint Thomas and having my first full time therapy job WHICH I LOVE. But I’ve put out a few completed pieces.

Ironically I actually finished this piece on the 4th of July but that is a trash holiday. We lit up sparklers in the front yard after dark and I yelled blasphemies about our country into the night. Anyway this piece took weeks and weeks, so hella tedious. I guess at least it shows, what with complex lighting and painterly shading. I even gave Danny his old school Eripmav tattoo under his eye. And you know Ingrid would have a neck tattoo.
I didn’t finish this but I also think I have a hard time doing airbrushing and ever feeling like it’s complete. So I didn’t bother and I’m uploading it anyway. Featuring, THE PUPPY! (he’s psychotic)
speaks for itself

Sorry. I am Not Dead.

Well, I realized last week that finishing up my Master’s degree has destroyed my ability to engage in activities I like. It was a really rough 5 months honestly. I was angry a lot of the time and depressed a lot of the rest of the time. It was just the fact that the end has been in sight since I started my practicum and it’s been a rough way to end such a long journey starting way back when I started at Adler in 2015.

But I got a job already and I have 25 hours of my 700 hours of supervision left to go. My new job is awesome and I have my own office to do therapy in with adolescents who really need help.

I’ve been managing art here and there but no big projects and nothing that remarkable. Regardless, I put together 20 pictures I’ve worked on this year that haven’t been terrible.

I don’t remember why this picture was so sad. I mean, stress probably. But it’s The Killers lyrics and they got me emotional.
Andrew and Micah have been coming up on my Timehop this last month. It gives me the urge to come up with another story starring them with a less problematic teacher/student relationship, oh Mary. I’m hoping when I finish up my internship I can focus on art projects more.
The Satos/Evereauxs/Stillwaters! <3
Magical moon girl
Magical wood sprite girl
Magical fairy boy
I have a suspicion I did this on Valentine’s Day cause they’re freaks and I love them
I color portraits of Micah with like 90% of my artistic energy
Siv doodle. What a great character design
Micah as a slutty boi
A portrait I did last week that is rocking serious Yellow Diamond’s Pearl vibes. #whyhaventidonestevenuniversefanart
sunshine girl drawn on the plane to or from Hawaii
triple moon goddess vibes
magical devil girl
spring witch
pisces energy
voyeuring on my husband
husband profile pic
ronan and baya
anna and josh. i’ve had more success with commissions than my personal art this year, probably due to lack of energy

closing thoughts for 2020

Ok but also I posted this on the 1st because I was very resistant to working on it sooner for whatever reason haha. But Ronan is obsessed with my office in the attic (it’s like 90% because of the moon tapestry I have that he’s obsessed with even though he can’t say moon, so he just goes …bhhhhhhhhhhhhhBA really emphatically) so I’ve been up here being creative more often.

Anyway here’s all the things I meant to do to wrap up the year.

Micah my dear, looking dope with sketchy lines and airbrush colors, like a character sheet from Saga haha.

Ok so the idea of kintsugi kept hanging in my head for this year not only because of all the insanity in the world but because of what happened to my back this fall. Physical therapy hasn’t been the miracle pill I was kind of hoping it would be and I think it’s going to be quite a journey back to a healthy strong body.

Anyway this was my first draft of the kintsugi idea

And it’s fine and everything= and her titties and lil back roll look real good but it didn’t really feel sophisticated or anything, so I pivoted and did a self portrait and was like YEp

So…no artistic goals for 2021, just going to see where the year takes me. 🙂

showing off? yes maybe

Merry Christmas from my OCs to you! My digital art has come very, very far in 2020, barring all other horrors of the year. It has been a good year for my artistic gains.

This photo is also a beast; I drew it at 11×14 which helped with all the fine details!

Can we appreciate Lucy and Levi hanging sun-globes on the tree? And Nikkei being a dumbass cat? And Danny cheating on his get swol diet, in a body inspired by scrutiny of Henry Cavill as Geralt? 😉 Also Micah’s sweater, give me yes pls.

I definitely have a lot of other art but I’ll save that for a separate post in the quiet days to come.

all grown up & out on the town

After a busy month of settling in to our new house and to my internship, I finally relaxed enough today to pick up my iPad. Yesterday a client at my internship kept describing themselves as “nostalgic” so then I got nostalgic and of course my mind turned to my imaginary fam. So I was like HMM WHERE SHOULD THEY BE and then I was like hey bro, nothing wrong with adults going to a bar, and voila. Andrew and Danny arguing while doing shots, Micah filming everyone, and Ingrid ignoring them and drinking good wine (or blood). V atmospheric, no?

quarantine/riots/manga DONE

Shocking all of us, I FUCKIN FINISHED Code: Compromised (best name I could come up with). It rounded out at 298 pages, infuriatingly. Haha. It’s not super high quality, overall I’d say though the images are better and more artful and obviously more skilled than when I was 18, realistically the paneling and bubbles are about like they were when I was a teenager.

I think the concept was super solid and the plot was really tightly knit, not trying to do too much, and the development of Micah and Andrew’s relationship was really tender and balanced (even if it oogs my husband out because Andrew’s older than Micah, sorry, I have my kinks, if you can even call “age difference” that…the teacher/student thing maybe, but age is shrugs.)

I go back and forth on whether I want to plunge into a “real” draft of it but I know I’d want to use my computer tablet for that, and having the time to do that seems like a distant dream.

I have to give an invisible blog shout out to All Time Low for their new album Wake Up Sunshine literally being the anthem for this whole story. It was fun to use a really old band’s new work to create my first new work in a really long time. I haven’t figured out how to best document like, I don’t know, the growth of these two since they came around in middle school. I know soon I want to add a page for this story to My Mental Breakdown but that’s another thing I have a hard time imagining squeezing into my stupid adult life.

The weirdest part about this project is that I’m really happy I finished a story but it was almost physically painful how obsessed, compelled I felt to work on this. At times in the last few months I was neglecting not only my child but my husband too and that was…weird. Writing feels like its cost has increased greatly since I was a carefree high school student. And the funny thing is that I don’t even feel “wowed” by this project’s quality, but if I’d put out 298 quality pages I think I’d be dead now.

So, more resolution on this project to come, but in the meantime, IT REALLY IS DONE! wow!

Here’s some art!

One of my favorite lines from ATL – “cause I’m not too far, and you’re my favorite place.”
Hands down my favorite page in the whole thing, and the upside down bi flag was coincidental; its’ a sunrise too hahaha. IT’S SO CUTE THOUGH GODDAMN

i had my headphones on and my husband just texted me from the living room that i was breathing very heavily, i guess these guys make me pretty hot haha
After musing on the accidental bi flag in the last page I threw this together today. I realized it is actually Pride month. But most people are keeping their mouths shut about it since there’s not going to be a Pride festival right now and the country has been literally up in flames for the last two weeks. So I think they’re realizing their Pride is not…super appropriate in light of Black people being murdered by the police. Yeah, current events in the captions of anime boys hugging!
k so apparently Harry Styles revolutionized the fashion world and like, the song that he was wearing a crop top in is some 70s trash garbage, but I thought Micah would be excited at the opportunity to wear a crop top, so I did this haha.

Lastly I wanted a statement to live on my blog forever about recent events. A lot of white people are having potentially their first encounters with white guilt so Black Lives Matter is currently a very trendy slogan to get behind, in addition to many white people stating for the first time that they’re mad about racism. As someone who went through their teens blissfully unaware of the diversity around them, before stepping into a very whitewashed community for a year, before stepping deliberately back into a diverse neighborhood in South Minneapolis without fully grasping how I was still contributing to systemized racism and also basking in my white privilege, who then read Counseling the Culturally Diverse by David Sue, who then felt super guilty for glamorizing diversity and being a bit exhibitionist about diversity in my art, who has then backed off from pretending like I have a place to speak about or be part of the Black community, who has then come to some sense of peace about things, who has now realized many people did not go through all this…I have done a lot of smh at the white community around me, well-meaning as they are.

Many of my friends, Black and white alike, were in the cities protesting following the murder of a Black man, George Floyd, by a white fucker of a police officer who is now being charged by our amazing Keith Ellison for second and third degree murder. Riots ravaged my nearby city. Shit got destroyed. Uncle Hugo’s was burned to the ground. I was…quiet, withdrawn and depressed, wanting to flee the country as snapshots from apocalyptic games, movies, books flashed in my head, thinking about my innocent albeit white male son growing up in a crumbling country. Since then it seems like there is some really important systemic change that’s beginning to happen, and a lot of organizations, like BLM, have received amazing charity funding that they’ve been scrounging for for ages. And I’m really glad for that. But I know with most traumatic events, the people who weren’t “hurt” by it will move on with their lives. And I wanted to make a statement and a commitment to not forget that I always have and always will support powerful movements like Black Lives Matter. And I am committed to raising my white male child to make this world a better place for his Black brothers and sisters, to know that he has privilege, to encourage him to use it to improve the lives of those who have less privilege than him.

On this blog, Black Lives always have, and always will Matter.