a huge valkyrie art push

z.m. celestaire  Art!, VADR, Writing!  Leave a comment

BOY AM I GLAD I DID SO MUCH BIRD RESEARCH FOR CFTM CUZ LOOK AT THESE FUCKIN WINGS GUYS

Vere is looking SO enby in this bahahahah

my dumb LESBIANS

That’s right, a sapphic couple I’M ACTUALLY HAPPY WITH AAAAAA

Vere’s redemption arc is SOLID bro

I also had a delightful revelation after giving Vere a two-headed axe because of GOW that the the labrys IS A SYMBOL OF LESBIAN PRIDE

HOW FUCKIN PERFECT IS THAT?!?!

there’s gonna be so many pics of them with a lesbian pride axe haha

BUT THE REAL STAR OF THE SHOW

IS ALAN FUCKING THORN

VAMPIRE JOURNALIST AND CELEBRITY DILF

I stg I haven’t felt this squealy about one of my own chars since Andrew was Atermist in Nikkei hahahaha

In some ways aesthetically he looks like an evolved Erik on paper but I’m working on that. Obviously he’s Alan as in Alan Alda and that’s what he looks like in my head, minus a bit of Alan Alda’s gawkiness.

I’m gonna redo this one, I want to get my vision out right

This vision worked though

Yes, he does have a slutty little waist, thank you for noticing

Yes, here, you have the twonk wooing the twink in front of his bear bf, primarily just to fuck with both of them

What a rake I tell ya

another good one of the bois tho

Bell is a koala baby who got unwittingly drugged by valkyries

he got very horny and Orion goes “he says all these outrageous things and I can do nothing!’

Orion is a grumpy soft baby

Work wifes

I didn’t get this comic right until we started re-watching SpyxFamily and I was admiring all of Loid’s crazy faces in season 1 when he just cannot with having a family at first

AND THEN HE SOFTENS BECAUSE HE IS PERFECT BABYYYY

a rough cover!!!

My plan is to post VADRHaters as a serial webnovel on Tapas! Means that the cover won’t be for a print edition and I feel like that gives me more space to have fun with it.

Character Anthems

  • Orion….
    • Bad Luck – We Came As Romans
  • Edie….
    • Antidote – Greywinds
  • Bellamy (all the gay twink songs fr)
    • First Hello – Grant Knoche
    • Caramel – Conan Grey
    • Never Coming Home – Point North
  • Vere
    • In A Lake – Mitski
    • Heaven – Ocean Sleeper (fight song)
    • Breach Birth – Chevelle ** (fight song and character theme)
    • Papercut – Linkin Park (confronting Agrippa)
  • Edie x Vere
    • Lovebombs – Precious Pepala
    • Miss Me – Honey Revenge
    • Dazed & Confused – Broadside
  • Edie & Orion
    • Go To Hell – Between You & Me/Yours Truly
  • Orion x Bellamy
    • Hotspot – Traveler
    • Simon, I Know A Place – Martin Baltser
    • Strangers – Ryan Nealson
  • Edie & Alan
    • House on Fire – Rise Against
  • Ensemble
    • Drag Path – Twenty One Pilots
    • Die To Fall – The Maine
    • Sleep Walking Orchestra – Bump of Chicken

the supernatural BL of the year

z.m. celestaire  Art!, VADR  Leave a comment

Oh no

I’m obsessed with these cuties

the first make-out

I made like 3 pictures for the same scene basically as soon as I finished drafting it because I was so excited about it lol

Also I just wrote their second make out and I really wanna draw it too but it just looks like another make out pic lol sooooo

Orion’s tattoos are NOT set in stone obviously come on

The desk chair pics look the same but they’re not one was before the make-out and one was after! Bellamy was smirking like that as he was saying this really sexy line

“Listen,” Bellamy murmured, “I fall hard for the chivalrous knight routine. I can feel how earnest you are in everything you do, and it makes my knees weak.” His fingers rasped against the stubble on Orion’s cheek. “But we both know that I need to be the one problem-solving this disaster.”

also i forgot about this bellamy pic cuz i love all his outfits

His face still isn’t quite where I want it to be but I blame the BL aspirations

also i did not know about this cat shifter character until vere stumbled into them lol

VADR babies

z.m. celestaire  Original Characters, VADR, Writing!  Leave a comment

I am really truly obsessed with the characters in this WIP of mine. They are so much fun to get into and even when I think I might be super stuck in the plot, they’re fun to write. It’s way too many POVs and I’m gonna hate myself during editing, but I’m really focusing on enjoying the drafting. Paint sapphics was such a letdown the whole time because I just sort of kept plowing forward and sticking to my outline, but I hated it the whole time and even worse when it was done.

This one might be running in the opposite direction. I think more than anything though I just need to keep myself hyped about it.

Alan is the puppet master of all the main kids
Vere goes through gender identity crisis AND race identity crisis
Orion I think just looks like Vic’s fiancee lol
Orion, Bell, Edie, and Vere
EDIE IS SO BEAUTEEFUL I LOVE HER SO MUCH THAT ADHD LITTLE BAE
Bell is such a diva
Can’t decide if Bell is trans or not so I’m just writing him as himself and I’ll decide later. Maybe.

Minnesota under fire again

z.m. celestaire  Art!, Emotional Breakdowns, MicahxAndrew  Leave a comment

Well, just like in 2020, Minnesota finds its sanctuary state invaded. Torn down. My neighbors are being kidnapped. Queer moms like me are being shot in the face for showing up and dissenting (RIP Renee Nicole Good).

I’m donating to gofundmes. I’m giving food to food shelves. I’m signal boosting reporters and activists in my area.

But I still cannot. Fucking. Believe this.

I don’t even think I’m entitled to be angry, I’m realizing. I feel stunned into silence, and I hate that. That’s not to say that I’m not spending every waking moment of the day looking for ways that I can protect and nourish my community. But I have not resonated with the white rage of my peers. It feels hollow and meaningless, like when people turn their profile pics black or “wear special bracelets”. The anger feels like it doesn’t recognize the folks that are getting flashbanged at Whipple or the Native aunties who watch their teenage nephews get punched and dragged out of their cars despite their compliance.

I’m fucking terrified, too. I don’t wanna get hurt and I don’t wanna wind up in the middle of anything like Renee. But I know that part of me is selfish and self-preserving. This is the reality. And after they have wiped out the populations I’m not a part of, they’re gonna come for me as a queer and neurodivergent person. That’s the thing. It’s not gonna end.

I couldn’t exactly get back to the regular bullshit online, and as I was thinking about all the lost momentum for Forget Me Not, it hit me how this is happening in my real state that is also fictionally Micah and Andrew’s home.

It hurts me to think about it and fall into my daydreams about these guys a little because it feeds a yearning for a savior to come in and put a stop to this. The politicians aren’t saving us, and democracy isn’t saving us.

Well, these guys wouldn’t stand for this lol. Micah would make problems. And that thought gives me a little bit of happiness during some very dark times in Minnesotan history.

We should have known being a sanctuary state wouldn’t mean shit against a tyrant.

But we’ll get back there. He won’t beat us.

The land will revolt against him. The people will be more powerful than him and his fucking thug bullies.

happy holidays

z.m. celestaire  Art!, Holiday Drawings, Original Characters, The Heartwood Trilogy  Leave a comment

Happy holidays from these drunk morons. I think this is one of the only pictures of Andrew smiling with his teeth that I’ve ever done unless he’s being a goblin. And I guess since he’s drunk this isn’t really an exception…

Chami’s too busy putting the Santa hat on Ingrid to notice the GIANT SPRIG OF MISTLETOE she’s hanging next to Chami’s face lol.

Also I’m really excited about Micah’s Balls of Holly shirt lol. Micah’s antlers are a play on his antler crown and balls of holly are because of his plant affinity so like TESTICLES MADE FROM PLANTS there I spelled it out for you idiots

Time for a review of holiday pics from years past!

This one is obviously not an xmas pic but it was another one of Micah, Andrew, and Ingrid drunk as fuck hahahah

2025’s a year in review (and a look back)

z.m. celestaire  Art!, Original Characters  Leave a comment

I thought these would take longer, but between my Drive and 5 years of Apple photo storage on my iPad, I was able to throw together a year in review for this year in addition to 2024, 2023, 2022, 2021, 2020, and 2019 lol. I didn’t upload 2019 though so…yeah that’s not going in here because I don’t care enough haha.

2025 was the year of…

Unifying line art and painting in the way I’ve wanted to do since I first started doing digital art in 2006. Working on powerful portraits. Practicing lots of different brushes to create the best sculptural, blended coloring as well as more depth and color variations. Really getting to create some of the compositions I’ve always wanted to make.

2024 was the year of…

Wry smirks, novel characters, and upping my portrait game.

2023 was the year of…

All the OCs, painterly rendering and line art incorporated into the coloring. Rich browns, experimentation with more decorative backgrounds

2022 was the year of…

Micah apparently lol.

2021 was the year of…

Stringy hair, dark shading, Ingrid and girls

2020 is the year of…

Micah’s green gauges, Micah and Andrew getting together for the first time!! :O

Halloween and whatnot

z.m. celestaire  All To Paint You Broken, Art!, Emotional Breakdowns, Holiday Drawings, MicahxAndrew, Original Characters, Writing!  Leave a comment

Ah, so, it was a very bleak and unproductive October honestly. Well, I guess, I thought it was – but then when I was putting together this post (on time for Halloween, but then I never finished it…), I realized that some of my criticism was the fact that, despite how hard I pushed myself to attach to paintwip, it just never took off. Draft is done, character designs are more or less decided, but I can’t get myself excited about any of it. When I finally decided to move on and focus on other projects or crafting a new one, it was like I had permission to have fun again. I’m not sure if it’s ongoing hangups with my own sapphic shame, or if Sepia just wasn’t a strong enough narrator. Not me wondering if I should rewrite it from 3rd person…

Anyway, here’s an art dump!

Art dump!

Spooky Kasi. She was my runners-up for best Halloween art but they were meant to be posted on my socials and I felt weird not having introduced her basically at all.

I was never excited about Pumpkin Micah, sorry bb

All Time Low lyrics obvi

Had to do a classic pic with lyrics from the new ATL album. I wanted to practice doing something colorful and delicate so I did butterfly studies. All five of them are real species lol.

Kasi’s a weirdo lol

Heartwood bois

Ok so hear me out

Gummy bears

I got a handful of them from a client and was like “These would make a pretty color palette” and here we are, Gummy Bear Andrew lmao

MY PRETTY BABIESSSS

Oh and this is the pic I did end up posting for Halloween haha

TUM!!!

Eripmav Kaehn of the FHV lmao

z.m. celestaire  Art!, Original Characters, Redraw  Leave a comment

So a few months ago I pulled up some old drawings to mess around with redraws and started to undertake redrawing one of my classic “heartthrob pictures”…see below lol

I did a draft of an update a few months ago but he suffered from Big Chin syndrome and kinda looked like he was in drag?

But I was bored this week and was stuck on making my nonman characters into Sailor Scouts, so I tried again and even Ryan was like “that’s quite a glow-up”

and hngggg