I read Sylvia Plath’s The Bell Jar when I was way too young, maybe 14 or 15. It was absolutely horrifying to me, drifting about from one mishap to the next with prose that made me want to cry.
But because of all of the elements I seem to be pulling from old American literature for this new Cadence/Solaris story, I started thinking about The Bell Jar again and found myself a digital copy for my Nook just this evening.
And…it’s so real. Esther is the 20-year-old first-person narrator struggling through her somewhat meaningless life and making friends with people she doesn’t really want and hoping for something to wake her up. Well…there you go. Not to say it’s NZ that’s making me feel that way, but I’ve been in her position so many times — coming to realize you’re embarrassed to be associated with someone, deciding deep down you won’t be but keeping them around as a resource because they’re brilliant or sly or fantastic.
And the line I just read, that finally pushed me into writing about it in here,
There I went again, building up a glamorous picture of a man who would love me passionately the minute he met me, and all out of a few prosy nothings.
UGH I KNOW ESTHER, I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN
Okay that’s all.